Sex Tips

What can be more frustrating than having no sex? Having sex that is over before its really even started!

Men are most commonly blamed for this but it happens with women too. The delay method is great for sorting out this issue among partners and also adds another element to lovemaking.

Looking for a new intimate foreplay activity to entice your lover? Something which can be a boundless turn on is hearing your lover’s voice recount some of your favorite erotica. Pick up your most worn and well-loved book of erotic short stories, or maybe something you have written yourself, and read a passage to your partner. See how far you can get before the book gets carelessly tossed aside in favor of heartier pursuits.

Listen up Ladies and Gents, it’s time to really do it. No shying away from it, YOU are going to finally enact your hottest fantasy! So, what turns your crank?

Sometimes people need a playful little hint to move in a new direction. If you want to try something different with your partner you might try initiating the change by slipping a little goodie in their stocking this year. It just might be that discovering a sample of a new lube or an erotic chocolate in their stocking will spark the sexy conversation or even the romantic evening you’ve been wishing for.

Scents can be powerful aphrodisiacs. All too often we overlook our complex sense of smell as a contributor of our sexual arousal. Maybe the next time you’re getting ready to have a little “me time” in the bathtub,

The basic rule of all erotic play is to use lighter touches when your playmate is less aroused and more intense touching when they are more aroused. Give your partner time to build up some of those fun sexy endorphins. Having your nipples stimulated at the wrong time or in the wrong way can cause pain or even nausea in some people. A great place to start is with a feather-light touch.

Some women or men will find rougher handling of their breasts and nipples, including nipple squeezing and pulling, hard sucking, and rolling of the nipples, to be very arousing.

This is where communication plays a huge part in any play. Demonstrate to your partner how you like to be touched and to give continual feedback about what you like. You can stimulate your own nipples during self-pleasuring or partnered sex. Most partners will find it highly erotic to watch you stimulating yourself.

For most women, it takes a fair bit longer than men to get aroused and to reach orgasm.  In fact, on average, it will take 20 minutes of direct clitoral stimulation before most women will be able to reach orgasm.  And guys (or girls), please remember that the visually available clit that protrudes from the body is not the only area you should pay attention to.  In fact, if your vag was a clock face and the clit was 12 o’clock, 10 and 2 are typically most sensitive.
 
If you really want to be a nookie star, try something with more control and techniques. Use your tongue and give slow, deliberate upward strokes against the sensitive underside of her glans. Get her fully aroused and then pull back the hood.
 

A change in temperature will stimulate and excite nerves.

When external conditions don’t change, your nerves will relax and become desensitized, operating on low drive because nothing is changing. When you alter the temperature, you stimulate the nerves, keeping them awake and increasing sensitivity.

You can use a wide assortment of things to accomplish this: suck nipples with ice in your mouth and then take a drink of hot chocolate (or any other warm beverage) and suck on the nipples again.  Take turns alternating sensations.  

Or pour a cool glass of chardonnay down your naked partner’s chest, into their belly button, then lap it with a freshly warmed mouth (tea or hot apple cider).

TIP TO DRIVE HER CRAZY…

Try what Kate Taylor, author of Life’s Too Short for Tantric Sex, calls Open Wide: Sit upright with your lady between your legs, her back against your chest. Caress her breasts with one hand and when she is relaxed, slip two fingers inside her, rubbing the front wall of her vagina. About two inches up, you should feel a small patch of tissue smoother than the rest – that’s her G-spot. Massage this spot in small, circular motions. With your other hand start to caress her clit, working in towards the clitoris and using one fingertip to massage directly on the hood that covers the clitoris. She’ll open wide to your love…

TIP TO DRIVE HIM CRAZY…

Of all the things to contribute to a better sex life, it's communication. Boring? Nope. Sit facing your partner with your legs open and resting on one another. Put a bottle or two of your favorite slippery lube within reach and slowly rub yourself to climax or two... Watching one another get off is a great bonding experience and an easy way to communicate our desires. Be daring and show your particular variations in how you play. This is a great time for a partner to show how their anus likes to be played with, their nipples toyed with etc. Talk through the process with a "then I like to back off a bit and tease my left nipple like this" or huff and groan as you enjoy the show with your lover.

For about 70% of women, clitoral stimulation is key in order to orgasm. That doesn’t mean we have to miss out on the penetration factor, unless of course, you’re just not a fan.

A great technique that will stimulate the clitoris during vaginal penetration with a toy is to tilt your dildo or vibrator to a downwards angle so that it is rubbing against your labia and clit, while still sliding into your pussy. For optimal stimulation, use a very flexible dildo.

Another option is to build a good pile of pillows that you can straddle comfortably, lay a towel down and straddle your dildo on your pillow pile. The pile of pillows should provide you with a nice base to push against as well as to wrap your legs around. This position is very similar to The Cowgirl, a G-Spot lovers’ favorite, it also leaves your hands free to explore and stimulate your clit. Definitely a winner all around.
 

When choosing a new toy its important to pay attention to the various materials that your new buddy could be made of, most important when choosing a soft toy. When talking about softer toys, there are generally 8 different materials that your new toy could be made of. So take a moment and peruse the options, we think Silicone, Elastomer, TPR and Vixskin Silicone are really the way to go in terms of eco and body friendlier materials.

- Silicone

Non porous and hypoallergenic, easy to clean, phthalate free (plastic softener), no smell. Can be boiled to clean or thrown in the dishwasher, durable and long lasting. Not compatible with silicone lubes.

- VixSkin Silicone

Non porous and hypoallergenic, just like typical Silicone but with more realistic qualities. Also has a lifetime guarantee from Vixen Creations.

- Elastomer

If I had a nickel for every time I heard someone say that stopping in the heat of the moment to put a condom on was a turn off, I would have… um, a lot of nickels. It always kind of bugs me because the implication in the statement is that looking after your partner’s (and your own!) sexual health isn’t “sexy”; that being a responsible lover is undesirable. Safe sex shouldn’t be a chore – knowing that your partner isn’t just an unstoppable sex machine, but also an INTELLIGENT unstoppable sex machine should  be titillating. Which is why I’m a big fan of any trick that incorporates safety techniques in extra-fun ways.

How often do you make your partner feel good about their sexuality?
Verbal strokes is a great way to do it; but unfortunately rarely done.
So try it. Think of something about your partner that you find attractive: their scent? their hair? the way they orgasm so enthusiastically? Everyone has some erotic nook or cranny that is worthy of praise. When you find the words, snuggle up to them, and whisper in their ear what you like so much about their erotic self. Next week, do it again. And again the following week. Maybe they will follow your lead and whisper sweet praises into your ear. Get this tip right, and you are sure to enjoy more heat between the sheets….

 Ladies, restrain your man or woman in a chair. You are going to offer your partner a titillating experience this New Year.

If you have it, torment with your cleavage. Truss your breasts up in their prettiest bondage, be it leather, rubber, silk corsette, or push-up bra. If you’re Special K size, like some of us, try a demi-bra that displays your nipples like pink kisses atop little mounds. Now lock eyes and imagine a crackling fire being reflected in your lover’s eyes (so your titties don’t get a chill). Slowly caress your breasts, pour some viscous liquid over their beautiful curves and if lickable use your partner’s lips and face to bring your nipples to their peak. You get the idea and if you have the front bum, let your tits do the talking, slip and sliding along your lover’s genitals, remembering to keep eye contact. Ring them bells and let the bubbly flow freely.