Autoerotic thoughts

One of the things we stand for – if not the main thing that we stand for – all the time here at the Art of Loving is peoples’ right to bring themselves sexual pleasure.

Masturbation, for me, isn’t just about orgasms. I know it may sound melodramatic, but I truly believe that there was a time when masturbation saved my life. When we are able to give ourselves orgasms, we don’t need to engage in risky sexual behavior, we don’t need to get sexually involved with other people beyond what we’re ready for – but most importantly, when we are able to give ourselves orgasms, it is because we are connected to and knowledgable about our bodies. And that’s good for us all around. It’s good for our health, it’s good for our sex lives, it’s good for our peace of mind.

Which is why I think this sort of thing is just messed up: http://www.p4cm.com/p4cm/store/launch

Check out these two articles: one from a boy’s point of view - http://www.dasouth.com/features/drty/450-masterbation - and one from a girl’s - http://blogs.myspace.com/index.cfm?fuseaction=blog.view&friendID=9647403.... (See? They’re all about equal opportunity for sexual shame!)

From the first:

"Most people who have engaged in masturbation know that the culmination of this sexual act ends in shame… Curled up in a fetal position, crying, because your bed is even more empty and you're lonelier than you did before you violated yourself."

Uh, wow. Grammatical errors aside (“you're even lonelier than you did”?) it sounds like there’s some serious pathology at play there beyond masturbation. (Oh, I’m sorry – MastERbation. Who needs spell check when you have sameful celibacy?!) I’ll admit – I was ticked off about these articles at first, but the more I read, the more I just felt terrible for the writers.

Luckily for them, I’ve put together little packages of toys we have at the store, to help them get back in touch with themselves, and show them that masturbation really isn’t shameful!

For the girls, there’s a set of silicone Smart Balls for kegel exercises; some all-natural, locally-made, vegan Hathor lube; a Hip G vibrator; some O cream; and a Pleasure Plug #1. (All of these are pretty affordable, because the girls in those pictures look about college-age to me.)

For the boys, there’s a protouch silicone prostate massager; a bottle of Maximus lube; a simple cock ring; and of course a Fleshlight Pink Lady.

Included in each of these gift packages would be certificates for free movie rentals, and a copy of Sex For One by Betty Dodson.

I think that’s as good a place as any to start undoing the damage caused by sex-phobic religious dogma, don’t you?