BETWEEN THE SHEETS

 

Happy Saturday morning everyone. Welcome back to another installment of Between the Sheets, our weekly blog post where we feature reader submitted stories of their own funny sexual encounters. As always these are real stories submitted by readers just like you, so if you like what you read here feel free to send me your own funny stories. This week we have a some great ones lined although I will warn you the last one is pretty gross so if you're put off easily you may want to skip it. Enjoy!

 

Submitted By: Anonymous


I used to live across the street from a very voluptuous couple who would regularly have naked make out sessions in front of the huge picture window in their living room. The best part was if the woman saw anyone outside watching she would run to the front door, open it up and start screaming at whoever was passing by about what a pervert they were. I kind of miss that neighbourhood. Never a dull moment.
 

Submitted By: Anonymous


When I was pregnant with my first child I was rarely in the mood for sex. Some pregnant women get really horny, but not me. Although my husband and I did continue to have sex, I could have gone the rest of my life without doing it and it would have been perfectly fine. When I was about 6 months pregnant my husband was having a shower after work with the bathroom door open. From where I was sitting in the living room I could see him get out of the shower and seeing him naked and dripping wet awoke something within me, and for the first time in months I wanted sex. I made up my mind to seduce him and start things off with an impromptu blow job. I heaved myself off the couch and called his name and gave him “the look” when he turned towards me. He asked me what was up I tried to answer but when I opened my mouth I somehow managed to inhale my own saliva. I started coughing and trying to clear the spit out of my wind pipe, all the while I was still walking toward him. By the time I got to the bathroom door the coughing was so bad that it triggered my gag reflex and just as he was reaching for me to see if I was ok I puked all over myself and the bathroom door frame. Then I started to cry. My husband was dumbfounded. But he cleaned me and the door frame up as I sat on the floor crying about how “I was just trying to be sexy”.

 

Submitted By: J M


I used to have a roommate who would never let anyone in his room. He never brought chicks home but would go to their places instead. I always just figured he liked his privacy, also he had a huge record collection and didn’t like people looking at it when he wasn’t around. We decided to throw a party and he took me into his room to pick out some music to play. The first thing I noticed were the dozen or so mickey sized whiskey bottles lined up on the window sill. Most of them were full of brownish whitish stuff. When I asked him what they were he said (as if it was the most normal thing ever) “Oh that? It’s cum.” I can only assume that it was his own, but I don’t know for sure. I’m also guessing that based on the nonchalant way he said it the he assumed that I too came into whiskey bottles and stored them in my room¯\_(ツ)_/¯

 

Well that concludes this weeks addition of Between the Sheets. As always thanks for reading and you can send your stories to rio@theartofloving.ca

Also just a heads up. Check the blog this coming Monday for the first edition of Ins and Outs. Every Monday we'll be offering a basic guide to all things sex realted. We'll be discussing everything from anal sex, to vibrators, to ball stretching. In additon we'll be providing answers to commonly asked questions. See you there!