I can’t say I’m really into the spiritual side of sex. “Sexual healing” is just an overplayed Marvin Gaye song to me and I couldn’t define “tantric” if you asked me. That being said, some of the seminar presenters here will often talk about the body, especially the more fun parts, storing emotional trauma. In his massage classes, Ki talks about healing the shame associated with our genitals. I’m totally into that, and here’s why:

Almost everyone I’ve ever been close to has admitted to crymaxing at some point in their life. I’ve done it, and it was probably the best orgasm I’ve ever had. I have a friend who worked through her abuse trauma with a dominatrix and cried in more than one session. I had a partner who would go home and crasturbate when we fought. I bet you've done it too!

Sex can bring up a lot of unexpected emotions and it’s rarely talked about. I’m not going to pretend to know why, maybe because sex itself is rarely talked about. Maybe because our culture likes to separate the physical and emotional. Maybe because patriarchy rah rah.

Whatever the reason, I’m trying to stomp it out and stop viewing emotions – good or bad – as something that hinders rather than enhances my sex life. I’m officially pro-crymaxing. Boohoo-oOoohh!