Merry Christmas... TO MY VAGINA

You know when your grandparents send you cash in the mail for Christmas and you use it to take advantage of the staff discount at the sex shop where you work? Yeah. Yeah you do.

Since I can't very well send them a thank-you card detailing what I bought with their money as I usually would, I figured I'd do it here.

Except I've been deciding and undeciding, ringing through and cancelling, combing through the demo vibes like a deranged chimpanzee on a hunt for the perfect banana, and I still can't pick just one! So I'm going to get two. And an all-natural 100% beeswax candle. And some Nag Champa incense. Oh god, I can't wait to go home and jill off in the bath.

I did some research at, and modified slightly from their suggestions (which would run me upwards of $200. One day... one day.) I've narrowed it down to Fun Factory's Smartballs ( and a Water Dancer from Vibratex ( I may well change my mind by the end of the day though. I had to talk myself out of splurging on a Magic Wand ( It was hard. No pun intended. HA! I need to go home.

Hopefully I'll manage to decide by the time I close up without driving myself crazy, and THEN... it's date night with ma Bad Self. Thanks Grandma.