Holy crap it’s gross out today. Very glad to be cozy in the shop with my coffee and space heater and Sunday classical music on the CBC. But it’s not all cozy-coffee-sipping-cellos in here, there’s work to be done. For example, it falls to me to tell you aaaaaaall about
So.
Having worked at various “adult boutiques” on and off for the past five years, you get to know all the lines. “Hey, condoms! You guys got a fitting room? Hyuk hyuk, hyuk.” “Where do the massages happen? It’s okay, I’m not a cop.” “My girl doesn’t need a vibrator, she’s got me.” “Glass?? But what happens if it breaks inside you??” This last one I’ve heard with increasing frequency of late, so I’d like to take a minute to talk about glass: why it’s awesome, why it’s worth the money, and why no, it won’t break inside you.
What better time to expand your sexual literacy? Maybe you’ve always wanted to have anal sex but have felt intimidated? Or you’ve wanted to understand your sexual side from a spiritual perspective? Or perhaps you’ve wanted to play with a strap on and don’t know how to go about it safely?
So last week was all about dulling the senses when they prove to be too…well, sensitive! But sometimes the opposite is the case, senses not sensitive enough! Luckily there is an entire world of products designed with exactly that situation in mind, and ‘cause “topical stimulants” doesn’t sound all that sexy, let’s call ‘em stimulating potions!
My friends,
I have come to you today to talk about a subject very dear to my heart: Dildos. First of all, it’s a great word. Dildo. Dill Doe. Good alliteration on them syllables. Also, notably, of unknown etymological origin. Who doesn’t like a good mystery?
